7 Frequently Asked Questions About Second Weddings

If you are planning your wedding, and one or even both of you have been married before, then you’ll know that second weddings are a little bit different to plan. But that doesn’t mean a second wedding is any less special than a first. Oh no! There are no rules that say you should have a low key wedding – take a look at these 7 most frequently asked questions about second weddings

1. How should we announce our forthcoming wedding?

If you or your husband-to-be have any children from previous relationships, then they should be the first to hear your news. Chances are they won’t be surprised to hear you are planning to marry, but even so, they may have to adjust to some changes when your two families become one.

Then you can tell parents, relatives, and friends. You might want to do this at a family get-together if you would prefer to tell close relatives next, or have an engagement party where you can announce your news to everyone at the same time.

2. Should we invite our ex partners?

If you have or your husband-to-be have very young children, then having their other parent at your wedding could help them through what might be a confusing day for them. It will allow them to see that although you are about to have a new life partner, their other parent is still an important part of their life.

3. How do we involve our children?

Children need to be involved in your wedding right from the start. Even the youngest children can help with some of the preparations, like making invitations and table decorations etc. When it comes to the actual wedding day itself, the children need to feel important and not feel left out.

There are lots of roles they can play, obviously depending on age. I’m thinking when it comes to the older girls, matron of honour or bridesmaids, and younger ones could be flower girls. All very important jobs! And there are plenty of ways to involve the boys as well – page boys, ushers, ring-bearer, and every groom needs a best man.

4. Who pays for a second wedding?

Normally in second marriages, the bride and groom pay for their own wedding. It doesn’t seem fair to ask parents who may have already paid for your first wedding, to stump up again. But that’s not to say, if family members or friends offer to pay for something – like your wedding cake for instance, or a wedding car or something similar then of course that is fine.

5.  Should we have a gift list?

This is entirely up to you. Chances are you already have a home and don’t need any more household items, in which case you may like to tell your guests that you are not expecting gifts. But people do like to celebrate a marriage by giving the couple a gift, so if guests wish to do this, (only if they ask) then it’s probably a good idea to have some ideas up your sleeve.

6.  What should I wear?

There really are no rules. It’s your wedding, so what you wear is up to you. If you missed out the first time round and didn’t have the long white gown, there’s no reason why you can’t wear one this time.

But most 2nd weddings tend to be less formal, so think about the style of your wedding when choosing your outfit. Is it a big, lavish affair, or a small, more intimate gathering? Are you marrying in a church, or are you planning to have a civil ceremony in a registrar’s office?

But whatever you choose to wear on your wedding day, the important thing is that you love it, that you feel good in it, and you know your husband-to-be is going to love it too.

7. Should we take kids on honeymoon?

Opinions seem to be divided on this one. Some couples think that a honeymoon is a special time for newlyweds. It’s your first holiday together as man and wife, and a time when you should share some time alone.

But others feel that having your children along on your honeymoon is a great time for the two families to blend and build some memories.

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